My Love Lessons

Seeking my Soulmate

"Incompatible, it don't matter though

'cos someone's bound to hear my cry

Speak out if you do

You not easy to find

Is it possible Mr Loveable

Is already in my life?

Right in front of me

Or maybe you're in disguise

Who doesn't long for someone to hold

Who knows how to love you without being told

Somebody tell me why I'm on my own

If there's a soulmate for everyone" -Natasha Beddingfield

I have always been a sucker for romance.  Some that knows me well might even label me as die-hard romantic. When I was  a young girl, whether  it was watching shows, dramas or reading romantic novels, I always enjoyed the love stories the most. I would relish in witnessing the characters meet each other, fall in love with each other and overcome trials and tribulations to be together. The main lead in the book or the drama would always have a special someone – a soulmate, who held out for him/her, who was steadfast in his feelings and would give it all for person he/she loves. Their love stories would always pan out to happy endings. I wanted that for myself. 

 I wanted my  soulmate, a person who i feel entirely whole, healed and intact, like no piece is missing from the puzzle I always thought of myself as a strong independent girl, but there has always been a big part of me who wants to be loved, protected and cared for. There has been a few times  where i  thought that I had finally met the  proverbial ‘good one’ but he never stayed for long.
My love lessons  in my quest to find that elusive soulmate has been riddled with great losses and heartbreak. 

Right now i have to get unstuck, let go and pick up the pieces of my broken heart, because another one left me. Wow and we had all the elements of being soulmates.  With him I had a tenacious, profound and lingering emotion which no words can encompass. We were mentally inseparable. We had that mental connection where we always would pick up the phone and call each other at the exact same time, like we are apart, but our minds was always in tune. I always felt like I could do anything with him by my side.  Kind of like us against the world thing. I know this might sound corny or a bit cliche, but we had the tendency to look each other in the eyes when speaking, and I thought this comes from a deep-seated connection.

I thought he was my soulmate and right now I am battling to walk away.  Dont they say its not easy to walk away from your soulmate because you cant imagine being without them and you believe its worth sticking around and fighting for. But he left and I must come to terms with that and right now it hurts so badly and I have moments where I can't breathe thinking about him and the loss.

Yet for now i still remain ever hopeful that my soulmate is out there and i will meet him in time to come.

PS. 'There is enough for everyone, but I am still waiting in line.
Somebody tell me why i am on my own, if there is a soulmate for everyone.''

Cheers

Nols